Wednesday, February 9, 2011

My Un-Bucket List

So today I turn 30 years old... please please, hold your applause.

Of course, this age is the one that comes with many questions...

"How do you feel about turning 30?"
"Do you feel old now?"

And sometimes some funny statements...

"Oh, you're so young!"
"30 is the new 20!"

But invariably turning an age with a zero on the back of it makes one introspective... and thus I've been fretting on my blog post for this day... what to write, what to write.

Shall I post about how I feel older? (Those gray hairs, wrinkle lines from smiling too much, and yes, wanting to go to bed early on a Saturday night instead of going out cause let's face it - sleep is awesome.)

Or about how I still feel like the young giggly 18 year old inside? (You know the one who still laughs when someone says "duty"... heh, doodie)

Or about the things I haven't done yet, those things that are on my "bucket list" to do.

You know you have one. We all do.

Its the list that consists of "going on a cruise", "traveling Europe", "skydiving" and other various things that we wish we will do someday... but face it, it won't happen and chances are they aren't high priority and our finances really don't allow for them.

So instead of the above items... which seems unoriginal, uninspired. I'd like to focus on my Un-Bucket List. Which is those things I'll NEVER do. Things I don't want to do before I die or that will never happen. So here are ten simple ones.

(Note: If you have no sense of humor or are generally up-tight, quit reading now...

... those of you who still remain. Congrats on being a normal, decent human being.)

1. Go blonde. No offense to you natural blondes, but I'm a brunette, through and through. It something that defines me and that I love about myself. Plus we're smarter.

2. Be debt-free. Let's be realistic here. My student loans alone should have me paying them well into the age that my lady lumps are at my knees. By then I won't even remember why I cared to borrow so much money for an education that really didn't help me in my career.

3. Drink to get drunk. Believe it or not, I've never been "Puke, I-can't-remember-last-night" drunk. And guess what, I don't want to. I'm too old for that shit.

4. Get any type of plastic surgery, Botox, Lifts/Tucks, or liposuction. Women are more beautiful when they age naturally. I want to look like a classy old lady... not a cat.

5. Become a vegetarian/vegan/organic/food naturalist. Again, no offense to those that are, but there's nothing more American than eating meat with hormones and pesticides all over it. I just don't care that much. Viva la DDT! (kidding!)

6. And on that note... Have no sense of humor. Let's face it, Antoine Dodson is funny, animals doing stupid things are funny, and internet memes give me a reason to working 8 hours a day in a hell, where the devil greets you at the door everyday with a smile.

7. Regret. I've made mistakes, plenty of them. Like not making sure the doors are locked when your nekkid... or yelling expressively at someone when the cut you off while driving and then realizing it was your boss's car... or using expired sausage to make a cheese dip that nearly poisons your whole family... but I digest. The mistakes I've made come with the consequence of having choices. And boy I've made some bad ones in my time. But I wouldn't trade them. I've grown, I've learned, I've become who I am today from my bad bad bad choices. So I'm ready to make many many more, (as I undoubtedly will).

8. Not care. (And this is a big one for me) I can't stand apathy, or lack of empathy. I'm a pretty emotional person, and I have compassion, love, and genuine care for others (I hope). I don't want to give that up.

9. Weigh 200lbs. It took a year of painstaking effort, gumption, and courage to undergo the physical, mental, and emotional challenge of changing my lifestyle. Never again. NEVER AGAIN.

10. Focus on what I haven't done, versus what I CAN do. (How very meta!) I'll probably never visit every country that I want to, I'll probably never skydive/bungee jump/para-sail cause deep down I'm really a chicken-shit, and I'll likely start to learn to play the violin, but invariably I'll give up cause ... well its hard! But...

I can do SO MUCH. I am a strong willed woman, and if something is obtainable, and that important to me. It's really not a question of IF I'll do it, its WHEN.

So here's to another 30, 40, 50 years of a happy and healthy life... may it be filled with no regrets, lots of love, and plenty of bad choices. ;-)



    I turned 30 last year (31 is approaching) and I feel stronger, happier and healthier than I did when I turned 20.

    I love your un-bucket list and wish you the best of luck and a very very very happy birthday.

  2. Love the idea of the un-bucket list! You said it today, you're not old today you're experienced.

    I hope you have a wonderful day today!

    (Pssst, I'll never go blonde, either.)