Monday, June 1, 2015

Meet Dubya

This was originally written in June 2011... reposting with some small changes. 

In the fall of 1996 I went to my high school's annual Halloween dance dressed up as Alanis Morisette. Yes, you heard me right. At this fun shindig, I happened to be re-introduced to a young man who was dressed up as Luke Skywalker. You see, I had met this young man many times before but this was the first time I'd seen him without his glasses on. And when I looked into those beautiful blue eyes of his. I was hooked. His name started with a W. (hence Dubya)

We lived most of our high school life inseparable. June 1st, 1997 until now. He had a truck and I had no driver's license so he spent his high school days trucking me around from school, to drama practice, to work, to home. Waking up at 5am to drive to the other side of town just to pick me up. We spent the weekends going to see movies and eating fast food. It was a typical high school life and we were in love.

Our freshman college year we were faced with an adult situation. I was pregnant. Needless to say it tested our relationship and we faced the difficult times together. We decided that we should just start our lives out earlier than expected and moved in together, had a kid, and got married. That's right, we did this the opposite way. Living on a modest income in a small apartment, we managed to send him through school (with some help from our families).

After he finished school and started working I was determined to go back to school, and we began the tiresome process of both of us working full time jobs, night school, raising a toddler, and owning a new home. During that time he supported his head-strong wife. He never once questioned my tenacity or perseverance. Even if he had, I'd have done my own thing anyway. He knew this about me.

Life went on. About seven years ago we faced tough times... really tough times. Our marriage was in trouble. And as hard as it is to reveal, it was all my fault. I blamed him for the way my life had turned out. For my lack of confidence, for the disappointment I felt in myself. For my fears. Somehow we still managed to talk. To openly communicate, and through doing so, I came to realize that it wasn't him I was angry with, but myself.

Instantly, things started to change. Not just with my eating habits or physical activity, but with the way I viewed my life, and the way I viewed the most important person in my life. I started taking time out of my day to exercise, started cooking differently, less snack foods around the house. I started blogging, tweeting, going to Fitbloggin and getting involved. Doing more things. Perhaps the dishes weren't always done. Sometimes the laundry got delayed. And not once was there a complaint. But always support.

I've always believed that friends come and go. Siblings move away. Children grow up. But that one special person in our lives remains (we hope) and they promise to share it with us - the good and the bad.

Today is June 1st.

It's been 19 years of learning about this boy/man. And in 19 years I still can wonderfully say I don't know everything about him. But there's the joy. That is the glorious part of sharing our lives with another human. He's been my best buddy. My movie watching pal. My partner in crime. My blog editor. My laugh-o-meter. My confidant. My shoulder to cry on. My greatest fan.

How do I say thank you for those truck rides everyday? How do I show him my appreciation for the wonderful father he has become? For the time invested in sending me back to school? For sticking with me during rough parts of our marriage? For supporting me 100% in my quest to make me, a better me?

How do I to show someone how much they have meant to me over these years? How do I say thanks? How do I let him know that I appreciate everything he has done for me?

I have an idea... With this.

21 comments:

  1. Hold on just a cotton-pickin' minute... I always assumed that the "Dubya" was "George W. Bush"; I can't adequately express my level of disappointment...

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  2. This is an amazing post. I had no idea you were with your husband for so many years. You two really are made for each other.

    So happy to have met him digitally!

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  3. This made me cry. Thank you for sharing, for honoring, for loving my brother. You are both such beautiful courageous people who deeply inspire me! I love you both. xo

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  4. Oh, I just started crying. I love you guys!

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  5. Beautiful post. Teared up again. :) We too had the baby then the wedding. Life works out funny sometimes... After meeting you, I couldn't imagine Dubya to be anything but amazing. xoxo

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  6. Thank you so much. :) He's a very special man...

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  7. Awww! What a sweet, sweet post! Looks like you have one awesome SUPER FAN right there. You are a very lucky lady and I’m glad you appreciate that. There are a lot of women who have awesome husbands who take them for granted.

    You know what the awesome part is? You don’t always have to say thank you for all the things he’s given you/done for you. Being a loyal, loving wife and a kickass, dedicated mother speak volumes of the love and respect you have for him.

    Great post. It *might* have even made me a little teary and think of my own husband. (I’m blaming it on Baby Key though. These days, everything makes me cry.) :)

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  8. What a wonderful and brave tribute to your husband and to your marriage (which in a lot of ways reminds me of mine)...and thank you for modeling respect. I believe that my husband taught me what love really is...and he loved me before I could truly love myself. He showed me what it looks like and for that I will be forever grateful.

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  9. This was such a sweet heart felt post. Love it! I am also one of those headstrong women who has a man that stands by me, through everything. I might have to steal your idea for my man now ;)

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  10. This is beautiful! Thank you for sharing with us :) xoxo

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  11. I loved this post, girl! It's so refreshing to hear about positive relationships and supportive partners. You two look SO happy together :)

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  12. Wow...so honest and inspiring!

    Congrats to both of you for sticking with each other through the struggles.

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  13. Thank you everyone for your wonderful comments. I'm honored to have shared our story with you.

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  14. Have him do the dubya walken voice!

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  15. You two make a great couple. The both of you have reached so many milestones individually and together. Wish you two all the best.

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  16. Wow. 14 years- congrats! I think the thing that resonated with me is that he is your sidekick come what may. I love hearing love stories- thanks for sharing yours. My Mister and I have been together for 8 months. Marriage is like iron sharpening iron, each of us sharpening each other. It's also this mirror of self which can be disconcerting but there's something powerful in being seen -really seen and loved because of and in spite of that which is seen. It's a gift.

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  17. Wow I love this. So tender, authentic. And brave. We love having you in our family Christine. And I love most that I see my brother has had a chance to become his best self at your side. Please keep loving each other. A marriage is work but it heals other people also when it is in a good way. couldn't be prouder of you both. Xoxo

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  18. Rock dud! Here's to 18 more years of love and laughter. I look up to you guys in more ways than the obvious one. :)

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